The Things Kids Say.......

Today I broke down and made my twice annual visit to Merle Norman.  I only go after I'm wiping the last drop of my foundation out of the container lid and cautiously using the broken pieces of rouge in my compact.  It's always a last ditch effort.

I hate going to Merle Norman for a couple of reasons:

#1  You encounter a young wrinkle free 20 something with great skin and perfect teeth whose make-up looks like she just stepped off the Miss America stage.  I then feel old and blotchy and incapable of stylishly putting on my own eye shadow.

#2  On your 2nd visit, when you've meticulously prepared for your head-to-head encounter with said Miss America, you find instead a 50+ woman who looks at you with pitiful eyes and a face that says "Sweetie, you shouldn't wear your eye shadow that dark..."

#3  Merle Norman is ridiculously priced!!!  And even though it breaks my heart to pay that much for make-up, I cling to the old saying "You get what you pay for!"  And since I have to smear this stuff all over my face everyday, I pray someday down the road I will see that extra money with no crows-feet and line-free lips.  And if I should happen to look like the side of a tree trunk 20 years down the road, I'm keeping all my receipts and I'm suing!

#4  I always walk out with more than I went in for.  I just don't understand it.  I'm in no way a push over and usually considered to be a hard sell!  But its like the Make-up Fairy sprinkles you with some kind of magic that turns me into a 15 year old again who "Just wants to look Hip!"  I can't count the number of crazy lip shades and frosted eye shadow that lay abandoned in my make-up drawer because I'm too practical to wear them once I get home.

Anyway, I dolled myself up and headed over with Brenna in tow.  I tried my best to stay on track this visit and did all my research before hand on the Internet.  I knew exactly what I wanted and in what shade (nearly).  I boldly decided to switch base because my usual foundation has been discontinued.  While the men may not appreciate this, I know all you woman out there feel my pain.  I've used the same foundation since I was in high school.  Switching foundations is like a proverbial nose job!   It totally changes the look of your face!

So, I went in knowing I would have to try a couple of different shade to find a new match.  After a couple of tries, I was wiping away the most recent reject from my cheek with a cleansing lotion and tissue when Brenna asked "Mama, what are you doing with that tissue?"  I explained that I was using it to take off my make-up when the Merle Norman laby handed Brenna a tissue and said "Would you like one Dear?"  To which Brenna replied "No thank you, I don't need to blow my nose right now."  I smiled and thought to myself, what a polite little lady she was to say "No thank you" instead of the snappy "NO!" you can get from some children.  And for a split second I was proud, until the leaned across the make-up counter and looked intently into the Merle Norman ladies eyes and followed that up with "I'll tell you when I have some snot in my nose!"

Priceless!   My little lady!  Now I have a whole new reason not to want to go to Merle Norman!